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Thoughts Out Loud – #9 Insecure S2E4 – Hella LA Recap

Note: The audio podcast is a condensed and slightly different version of the blog post. Also, does not include the police incident.”

I’m Danielle and you’re listening to Thoughts Out Loud on FrizzyFro.com.

This is the Insecure season 2 episode 4 Hella LA recap. Also, don’t forget to also check out Insecuritea the official recap podcast hosted by Crissle and Fran.

I want to mention the Black Twitter condom saga. So, after another sex filled episode, Twitter started crying and whining about condoms again; so much so that Issa Rae took to twitter to show, with pictures, that they do place condoms on the set. But YOU PEOPLE came back with some of the most idiotic responses:

“But did he use them is the question”
“They not open”
“They was present, not necessarily used”
“But if there is no pause to put them on then it’s just condoms in the background”

These people do not deserve to watch MA rated tv shows. Negros really do need a college fund because a mind still is a terrible thing to waste.

Issa said they would do better next season, but I don’t want them to change a single thing regarding condom use.

Ok, Let’s get to it.

Issa and Kelli are at Molly’s apartment preparing to attend the Kiss-n-grind event.
The overall conversation was great Kelli has been drinking all afternoon waiting for Molly to get dressed, Molly and Issa share thoughts like twins where they have a complete conversation without using any descriptive words. There were some good lines, including the one about Felix being a cat, but I laughed out loud at Kelli saying, “No, but for real, we should go because they will actually give our table away.” as she grabs Molly’s wine out of her hands and pours it down the sink.

For all of you people thinking Lawrence lied about getting an apartment…
Lawrence is in **his** bathroom showering and rubbing his hair into curls with that hole-y sponge thing I’ve seen people use on YouTube. Chad is at the barbershop getting his hair cut/done/styled and calls to find out Lawrence’s status. Lawrence wants to bring fighting Gerald, but Chad is against that idea due to a previous Chipotle situation, which, according to Chad, supposedly has a low-key delicious tofu bowl. I am a barbacoa bowl kind of girl myself and I don’t do soy or tofu.

Chad is happily impressed that Lawrence wants to be social. Whatever this place is, is going to be filled with the fun and excitement drugs and alcohol supposedly bring. We should also note that soon to be married Chad is saying “what up, girl” to some unseen woman on the street.

Kelli, Molly, and Issa show up at the kiss and grind event and walk the longest mile to find their table waaaaay in the back. As they start to settle in, Dro walks up. Remember how last week I didn’t understand why we were meeting Dro and Candace? Well, that was the show’s awkward way of introducing new characters to us. I guess they are important. Shrug Anyway Dro (short for Alejandro per Issa Rae’s tweet) makes fun of their inexpensive table choice and calls them Destiny’s Child. Kelli takes offense and asks “Uh, who is Michelle?” In response, Dro’s face looked like Kelli asked him to solve a complex math problem in his head. With no immediate response from Dro, Kelli whispers to Issa, “It’s you.”

Dro mentions that Candace is at a meditation seminar. Molly says that she appreciates that Dro and Candace can just “do their own thing”. Dro mentions he has chicken tenders at his table, and that’s all Molly needed to hear. Molly leaves Issa and Kelli at their table as two stranger women walk up and try to sit down. Both Issa and Kelly shoo them away like cats you don’t want near your feet. One of the women says, “Your table sucks anyway.” Kelli has her hand to her chest in a true offended southern woman pose as if to say, “Do my ears deceive me? Are these peasants daring to disparage things they themselves do not have”?
My question is, if the table sucks so much, why were you trying to sit there?

Kelli has this thing for taking people’s drinks and doing with them as she sees fit. This time she takes Issa’s drink as she walks off to meet some men.

Issa is left standing there and spots Daniel across the room.

Lawrence is stuck in traffic because of a biking event that has the streets closed off.
He decides to make a U-turn and gets pulled over by the police. He immediately switches from rap music to a soft instrumental music station. He has both hands on the steering wheel at the appropriate 10 and 2 locations and prepares for the officer’s interrogation. “You in a rush? Is this your car? Where are you going?” The officer asks for his license and registration. Lawrence reaches in his back pocket and says, “Get my license”. As he pulls his out license, his bankcard falls out. He tries to put his wallet back when the other attending officer yells out “Put all your hands where my eyes can see. Straight buckwildin in the place to be” nah, just kidding. He yells, “keep your hands where I can see them” and has his hands on his pistol. The first officer comes back to give Lawrence a warning and crack jokes about their alma maters playing some sporting event; Lawrence’s Georgetown to the officer’s Villanova. I have been stopped by the police only once in my life. Well, technically it was twice but both happened on the same day just hours apart. I was not raised to fear the police and I had almost zero interaction with them growing up. And even in to adulthood I thought they were here to help people get kittens out of trees. I also want to mention that I have what’s called a “smart mouth”. Sarcasm and condescension also dwell deep in my spirit and appear when they think they are needed. So, I may or may not have been condescending to one of the police officers when he asked me obvious questions. Back to Lawrence. His experience and my experience are not the same, so I’m going to leave it at that.

I don’t know what this dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign song is, but it makes me involuntarily bounce.

Back at the kiss and grind, Issa asks Molly to guess who she just saw and Molly responds with, “Is it the girl who plays Ninny? Because I think she’s here.”
This is where audio fails me. I need emojis or video to display the intense side eye I am giving Molly right now. Distressed Issa tells her Daniel is present and does bodily harm to Molly when she looks around to find him. So, why does Issa think that she has to confront Daniel? WHY? Why can’t he stay on his dark side of the room and Issa stay on the other side of the dark room? Using my foolproof strategy, they could effectively ignore each other for the entire evening. Or, as I experienced this week when someone I know walked past me, pretend he is invisible. But you can’t be stone faced about it like the person who ignored me. That just let me know that I was seen and you were determined to ignore me. Your loss. Have a great life!

Issa claims that she has to be the adult and deal with this drama. I said out loud in response, “there’s no drama!” Like, he hasn’t even seen her and she’s talking about drama. It’s been months and she is talking about drama! This just proves that drama exists only in the mind that is imagining it. Sheesh.

Song Lyrics — “Shea butter twitter be callin’ her a queen’ – I don’t use shea butter, but I do have shea moisture. Someone needs to explain this shea butter twitter thing to me one of these days.

Issa walks over to Daniel’s area. Daniel is minding HIS OWN BUSINESS and she’s wants to talk to him. He has nothing to say to her and she manages to utter a string of words that aren’t really forming a coherent thought. Daniel is all like yeah, it happened months ago, so whatevs, homie. When he asks Issa if she’s good with the situation, she says she’s good and ends up singing the Living Single theme song. Girlie, this is why we have Twitter. Let me explain how this works: Open up a fresh tweet, add the microphone emoji, and then type out those lyrics. That’s it. You’re done. You DO NOT sing the lyrics in person simply because you are feeling uncomfortable. Don’t do that. Never do that.

Buuuut, here’s a thought: by singing the theme song she just let Daniel know that she broke up with her boyfriend and is unattached, so maybe singing awkward lyrics isn’t a bad idea after all. Let me add this to my strategy for the next time I am around a delicious looking black man.

Molly and Dro are sitting on a couch scouting out dudes for Molly to dance with. They spot one dude, but guess who is dancing with him? Kelli.

Lawrence is in the store trying to buy some Coronas and Maker’s Mark when he finds that his bankcard is missing. He doesn’t have a way to pay so the two conniving wenches in line behind him offer to pay the $46.92 for his liquor. “We’ve got it. No worries.” (I find that a lot of people living in sunny places like California and South Florida like to say “no worries”.)

One woman says, “Does he look like Craig to you?” I feel like that would be my first clue to thank them and run away, but not our Lawrence. He decides small talk is important and asks what they will be doing this evening. Let the coy games begin “oh, we aren’t doing anything. Just drinking wine and staying out of trouble. Too bad you have that thing to go to.” At the first hint that they wouldn’t mind spending time with him, Lawrence turns into Mariah Carey with the whole “I don’t know her” stance as it relates to hanging out with Chad.

Issa is sitting outside waiting for Felix to show up. He arrives and they awkwardly hug. Issa proceeds to call him “Folix” because of the typo in his dating profile. He says he didn’t recognize her because of her current hairstyle. She says she likes to switch it up and he’s all like “You ever switch it back?” That would have been the end of Folix for me. I am rude and would have promptly turned around and walked away. But not Issa; No, Issa stayed for more. Folix next criticizes her voice, and Issa decides to make an excuse instead of kicking him straight in his kneecap. In the end, Felix curbs Issa and walks away. Jerk.

But look at who witnesses the exchange: Dirty Daniel. He smirks and looks away.

Molly and Dro are hitting the dance floor and doing some sort of dance with words type of battle. And then…Molly turns around and presents her round mounds to him. Almost instantly the DJ switches it up and plays Juvenile’s Slow Motion and these two are dirty dancing in the darkness.

Molly starts to feel uncomfortable with the grinding and says they should stop because his wife wouldn’t approve. Dro then let’s her know that he and Candace are in an open marriage. They are supposedly allowed to be with other people. I do not believe anything men say, so I would have to hear it from his wife. But instead of saying that, Molly asks “since when?” and Dro says a year ago. Sooo, I would like to ask some follow up questions if you don’t mind: Who made this decision? Him or her? Is Candace really cool with this? Ok, let me focus. Dro is still talking and saying words trying to convince Molly that this open marriage works for him and his wife and blah blah blah. Molly looks highly skeptical, but yet she is still listening.
I have a low tolerance for nonsense and to me, what he is saying falls in to the nonsense category, so I would have been like “well, ok. I need to go back to my table now. Have a wonderful life letting whatever happens happens without me in the middle of it.”

Dumb Lawrence is sitting on the couch at wench island while one girl pours him a drink and the other rolls an L. Lawrence is texting Chad that he can’t make it because he thinks **one** of them is feeling him. One of them comes over, takes his phone, and takes a picture of them together as she licks his face. She proceeds to send the picture to Chad as evidence. Chad responds with a gif of a dancing man.

The licky face girl asks if he likes The Weeknd. Lawrence hesitates and then says yes and so she starts doing an arched back dance type of thing. She climbs on his lap and to Siri’s credit, she tried to block this from happening. She was like “SAY WHAT? I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.” It didn’t work though because the 2 of them start kissing and then the 3 of them are kissing and then Lawrence pulls back to see that the 2 of THEM are kissing. I feel like that winking face pillow on the chair is thinking, “I knew this was going to happen again.”

Issa is at kiss and grind sitting on the couch scrolling through tinder profiles when more random girls try to sit at their table. Kelli and Issa shoo them away as Molly walks up and tells them Dro hit on her. She asks the question, “Is anyone married like my parents anymore?” Issa mentions Derek and Tiffany. But they also mention that he stayed in a hotel for a year. Molly’s parents have probably also had challenges but she may not know about them. For all Molly knows, **her** parents could be in an open marriage and that’s why they have been together for so long.

Issa asks if Molly is considering getting with Dro. Molly says that it’s not an option because he is married. She saaaays it, but her expressions suggest otherwise. Mmhmm we will keep a close eye on you Miss Molly.

Lawrence is in the middle of a threesome with Sandra saying words I’m not willing to repeat. But in essence, she points out that his blackness feels good in her whiteness. And when she said it I looked at the screen like “excuse me?” And she continues to say porn-like phrases. Someone on twitter pointed out that she was also quoting some song lyrics. I wasn’t familiar with the song so I asked Google and the song is Novacane by Frank Ocean. Miko who has been sitting on his face decides she wants to have his blackness in her, too, but Lawrence is spent and cannot give her what she wants.

He tells them to give him a minute to recover. While he is recovering Sandra and Miko discuss the fact that they have been with a BUNCH of other black guys and Lawrence is like “a bunch?” The women decide that now would be the perfect time to reminisce over the crazy night they had with LaMarcus and how it would be great to order pad Thai using Postmates. But due to a possible surge charges because it’s Saturday, they decide that the place on the corner would be a better option and they could still make it to Michelle’s party. This entire conversation is happening while Lawrence is lying in the bed looking all kinds of incredulous.

The kiss and grind is winding down and Issa asks Molly if her profile picture looks like her. Molly said, “your face is your face, but you have the hair of another person.”

Kelli joins them and says that her guy (whose name she cannot remember so he christens him “Sweetie”) is going to Swingers and so are they.

As they are heading out, Molly sees Dro across they way. And for whatever reason, feels like she should engage him in conversation. rolls eyes She tells him she is going out to eat with Issa and Kelli and he says he will text her later. AND SHE SAYS ‘OK’. Whyyyyy?

They get to the restaurant and Kelli is being Kelli. Issa sits down and sees Daniel across the way. They silently acknowledge each other.

Lawrence is sitting in his car thinking thoughts about what he just experienced. Chad calls him to get details about the evening. He asks, “What is great? It was great, right?” and Lawrence lies and says that it was great.

Lawrence hangs up with Chad and looks out the car window. He is parked in front of The Dunes, Issa’s apartment. Aw maaaaannn! I was hoping to get though this episode without having to deal with either of their deep down feelings. I’M NOT GOING TO DO IT! I am going to let him drive off with his feelings and maybe we will revisit this next episode.

Back at the restaurant, Kelli asks Sweetie if he got anyone else’s number. He replies with, “ No! Once I saw you, baby, it was a fajita. That’s a wrap.” Molly and Issa are disgusted by these two and their shenanigans. Molly gets a text from Dro. He asks if she wants company. She tells him no, but not in a way that 100% shuts him down.

“So, if you were going to make me dinner, what would you…” Kelli stops talking and Sweetie is sitting there with a slight smile on his face. Issa has a mouth full of food and looks up because the words just abruptly stopped. Kelli is breathing hard and clears her throat. Issa is looking quite perplexed. She tries to get Molly’s attention, but can’t because Molly is learning about the seriousness of Lion King in this day and age. She makes eye contact with Daniel who texts her “Yo, Is your girl getting fingered under the table right now?” Kelli and Sweetie are muttering about a cheat day while trying to pretend like nothing is going on. Issa and Daniel chuckle. Molly watches as Issa takes her food over to Daniel’s table where the two of them are laughing as the episode ends.

As a note, I realize there are cameos in this episode that I did not mention.

Did you enjoy the recap? Be sure to share the show with friends.
You can contact me by email at Danielle@frizzyfro.com or on Instagram and Twitter @FrizzyFroPod.

Thoughts Out Loud #8 – Insecure S2E3 Hella Open Recap

This episode was created at the request of @12Kyle on Twitter. He was like “you gonna do a recap for ALL of the episodes?” and I was like “All of the episodes?! mmm I’ll do this one for you and we will see how it goes.”

And as always, don’t forget to listen to Insecuritea the official recap podcast hosted by Fran of heyfranhey.com and The Friend Zone podcast and Crissle of The Read podcast. As an FYI, I am not paid to do any of this. (Update: To clarify, I meant that my podcast and blog are not sponsored and I do not receive money for acknowledging one of my favorite podcasts.)

Before I get started, I would like to say Congratulations to the Insecure HBO team for the season 3 renewal.

Let’s get in to Season 2 Episode 3 – Hella Open

I felt like the tempo of the Hella Open episode was different from the Hella Questions episode. And no, I am not going to compare and contrast the 2 episodes. I can say that I was disappointed that there was no North Star show for me to mimic. That’s ok though because the family BBQ, Tasha, and the twitter condoms craze are a big part of this recap aka the retelling of what you already know. So let us rush through the first part so that we can get to the good stuff. Are you SURE you’re ready for this deconstructed recap?

– Issa’s Tinder fingers
This scene was filled with awkward laughter, awkward fingers, and awkward exits.
“I got this from a swap meet” Issa while putting on her shirt.
Issa couldn’t bring herself to sleep with Tinder date dude.

– Issa’s Phase (no hoe)
Issa makes some real comments about the insecurities that arise when having sex with a new partner and/or finding someone you actually WANT to have sex with.

At the bar/club/entertainment establishment, Issa starts to say that she’s not out here looking like these hoes when a girl walks by wearing the EXACT same dress and Issa had to pause her statement.

Issa strikes out with all of the men she meets. One man just stopped her and was basically like ‘look, I’m not here for you’ (Angelica -Hamilton style. If you don’t get the reference, go see a Broadway show)
He was sent to keep Issa away so that his friend (played by Sterling K Brown) could talk to Molly.

Meanwhile, Molly is talking to dude. He asks for her number so she gives him a business card and walks away.

Molly approaches Issa and asks, “So girl, how’d you do?”
Issa responds with a big smile, “I got these wings!”

Confession time: In this scene I would be Issa. If someone managed to get me into that kind of environment I would be sitting in a corner or at the bar eating chicken wings, and my friends would be quite disappointed, but not surprised by my anti-social behavior.

– Frieda’s Amigas
We Got Y’all but Frieda wants to balance the demographics because all of the students in the program are black. The problem? The school is 86% Latino. Frieda asks the kids: “Do you have any friends or, like, amigos, amigas?”

Is Issa Dee really that oblivious to the work situation? Why is she all of a sudden color blind? Does she really think that what Mr. Gaines is doing is no big deal? Last season Molly had the bad attitude, but this season we have been exposed to more of Issa’s personality, and I’m not liking what I see.

– Issa’s Battery
Issa is in bed alone trying to find some self-pleasure but why does it sound like a weedwacker? I kinda want to ask what is going on down there, but that’s really none of my business. Have you ever rubbed a battery on your jeans or couch or carpet to get a little more power out of it?

– Molly’s Therapy
It looks like Molly used up all of her words last episode because she gave up on Dr. Rhonda.
She claims she is going to find another therapist. All I have to say is that they better have a magnificent bookshelf like the one Dr. Rhonda has.

So…if Molly can’t commit to a therapist, what makes her think she can commit to a relationship?

– Molly’s Big Brown Box
Molly is at a warehouse…in heels and a skirt…picking up her build a bookcase box. First she is offended that the dock person thinks she is with the man standing behind her. And then, instead of asking for help she decides to struggle with carrying this big brown box. She gets the box to her car and she watches as a woman directs her male partner to carry her box to their car. The look on Molly’s face suggests that she is back to wanting a male companion in her life.

Why is Molly trying to put together a bookshelf? It’s like she is living my life when I was trying to put together those IKEA bookshelves.

Molly is trying her best to get Issa to help her turn all of those random pieces into a useful object, and Issa is doing all that she can to ignore the task. She literally throws one of the pieces to the side while trying to convince Molly to go out and hoe.

Later in the episode, Molly chooses to ignore Lionel’s attempts to see her again and sips wine as two hired men put together her bookshelf.

– Molly’s Miscellaneous Moments
Thought: Molly is going to love Chicago and find a man there. OR, she is going to like this Lionel guy, but end up with a career in Chicago or something like that.

Molly goes on a date with Lionel and he said they skipped the awkward first date and now he is talking about fast forwarding through life. When I first watched this I felt so uncomfortable because why is he talking like this? It’s so creepy, but Molly seems to understand…I think.

Issa was high on paint fumes when she told Molly that Lionel sounded just like her. Molly appears to be mortified and now she doesn’t seem to be as interested in Lionel.

Who are Dro and Candice? Were we introduced to them before? It was like, why is Molly talking to these two random people. Apparently Issa knows them, too. I don’t know. Maybe they don’t really matter.

– Lawrence’s Travels
At Lawrence’s job one of his coworkers says: “They’re not chips, they’re chirps. Made from crickets”Note: Lawrence has been to Phuket and has eaten crickets. The man has travelled the globe.

Lawrence’s excuse for not participating in Startup Saturday: “I would love to, but I promised someone that I would pick up some chairs.” Everyone stares in “pardon me?” and he adds that it’s a family BBQ.

You know how you call someone “someone” when you aren’t willing to commit to their name?

– Lawrence and Tasha’s History
This is the juicy stuff that has everyone worked up, so I had to do a little research to refresh my memory.

Exhibit A
Let’s go back to Season 1 Episode 4 at approximately 18:46 minutes in where Lawrence says “My girlfriend LOVES kale” and Miss Tasha keeps on talking like he said nothing. Also note that when Tasha pulled out the hot sauce Lawrence gave her a look like “did you really do that?”. Yes, I know Beyonce carries hot sauce in her bag, but I firmly believe you should not carry condiments in your purse.

Exhibit B
AND THEN, in Season 1 Episode 5 “Shady as F…” at approx. 17:27 Tasha enters the Best Buy with her breasts all exposed talking about she needs some batteries. And she is smiling and wiggling ohh and she’s talking about Jalapeño Poppers and asked Lawrence out. And AGAIN Lawrence said “I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND, TASHA”

Back to this episode…
We are at Tasha’s house. The 2 of them are in bed and Tasha is talking about family members made of potato salad or something. No one cares. Also, Potato salad is 1000% disgusting.
Lawrence is like, who are these people? And starts rubbing on her because he really doesn’t care about the people and he’s not there for her words.
She says, “Are you even listening to me?” Um…Tasha, no, he is not there to listen. Sure he said “of course”, but that was a lie. Duh

I need for Tasha to sit down and talk to us Real World confessional style and explain WHY she invited Lawrence to the family BBQ, and what her actual expectations were for this man.

He CLEARLY was there for sex. No, he wasn’t listening to anything you had to say because he wasn’t interested, but you were just too happy to have him there to pay attention to the signs.

Both of y’all are guilty.

– Lawrence’s Coworkers and Tasha’s Family
Against all better judgment, we arrive at the family BBQ, and we see kids running around and people playing dominos
True to his word, Lawrence is carrying chairs and we meet Tasha Thomas’ play uncle who is wearing his Obama 44 apron and already seems to know who Lawrence is. Mmm…seems Tasha has been running her mouth just a bit too much.

Another one of her cousins (we don’t know if he’s for real or for play-play, but let’s call him Mr. Illegal Music.) Mr. Music has on a spray-painted RIP shirt in contrast to the button-down shirt Lawrence is wearing. Lawrence is all about rules, while music dude is not.

Did you hear how Tasha calls him baby, and Lawrence responds like his name is baby and goes to do Tasha’s bidding?

Did you also notice how he is walking around the cookout looking incredibly uncomfortable? He is surrounded by stranger people doing stranger things, when he gets a text from his coworker reminding him of the Saturday Startup. He tells Tasha he has to go, but that he would be back. (Yes, that was a lie. We all knew he wasn’t coming back.)

Lawrence shows up at Startup Saturday (which, honestly is more his speed.)

Tasha is texting Lawrence to ask where he is. Now, while technically he is at a work function, he is not actually working like he said in the text message.

Some of this review comes from the twitter responses I read during the live tweet.
Lawrence looked uncomfortable around her family? Why? Well, socioeconomic and cultural differences are probably at play. Maybe Lawrence doesn’t like strangers. (I can relate to that.) A family of rule breakers and flute players is a lot for an outsider to take in. Lawrence is more comfortable around his work people because they probably are of the same educational background and have technology in common.

– Tasha’s Toodaloo
Tasha calls Lawrence and asks what happened and says to him “If you didn’t want to come, you should have just told me that.”
Let me take a moment to speak in a language Tasha understands.

🤔…

Miss, Thomas. YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE INVITED HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE! YOU CLAIM YOU KNEW THIS WASN’T A SERIOUS THING, BUT YET YOU TOLD YOUR PLAY UNCLE ALL ABOUT HIM. You are the one calling him baby and having him help wheel your aunt around. He was an outsider, but you tried to make him family.

He tells her that he wasn’t looking for anything serious and she continues with “my whole family was here and you just ghosted.” and mentions that she was embarrassed. Like I said, I feel nothing for Tasha. She brought this upon herself. Don’t bring “not serious” dudes to meet your family. That’s YOUR fault.
Now, to be fair, Lawrence should have declined the offer. I don’t know how men think, but maybe at the time he accepted he was seeing Tasha differently or was TRYING to see her differently. Or, maybe he felt it would be wrong to say no. Either way, both of y’all are guilty of making dumb decisions.

She then calls Lawrence some choice words and hangs up. (I’m not an N-word user, so we will just leave it Fuckboy.) I struggle with this term because it depends on which urban dictionary entry you choose to apply. Tasha was never his woman. Did he lead her on? She even admitted that they weren’t exclusive and that she knew it wasn’t serious. Of course, she could have been saying all of this simply because of her hurt and embarrassment.

Tasha only chose to see in Lawrence what she wanted to see. She constantly denied that he even had another woman in his life. She threw her breasts at him by way of saying that she cleans up nicely, and when he is finally free to do what he wants, he takes her up on her sexual offer. When did she ask for more? When did he offer more?

Enough of this. Goodbye Tasha. May you and your exposed breasts find an actual boyfriend soon.

– Issa’s Neighbor Dude
Issa is in the process of paint over her smoke damaged wall when she sees Eddie sitting out by the pool. She decides that the best way to get what her dead vibrator couldn’t provide is to pretend Eddie left his charger at her house. Her plan works and she manages get into his house and have all of the sex with him.

Buuuut, before all of the sex, Issa and Eddie are sitting on the couch discussing Gossip Girl. I loved that show and was sad, but satisfied when it went off the air. But why did they mention Blake Lively though? Serena wasn’t the best character. Blair was my favorite.

Issa and Eddie commence with the awkward sex. Eddie is so considerate; his headboard has built-in hole for Issa’s head. Aww! How sweet is that? Ungrateful Issa doesn’t approve of her head being stuck in the hole and asks to change positions and finally gets all of the man meat she has been craving.

Issa leaves Eddie’s apartment (with her charger).

The show closes with a Tinder message from Felix saying they should hang out sometime and Issa smiles.

One last thing

– Black Twitter’s Condoms
I’m tired of reading, “Where are the condoms?” and “Everyone is hittin’ raw” Can you all grow up? Just because you don’t see it happen on the screen doesn’t mean safe sex isn’t being practiced by these characters. Sure, someone COULD end up pregnant. And yes, weird Twitter person in my mentions, someone COULD get a venereal disease but I don’t think this show is looking to educate. It’s simply a story.

Also…

****Scripted shows are NOT reality shows or documentaries****

How many of you think these actors are ACTUALLY having sex on set? Hmm? If this was a documentary, I got you. If this was your homegirl down the street – I got you, but this isn’t either of those situations.

Dear Issa Ray and Prentice Penny, to appease your simple-minded segment of your audience, perhaps you would consider using implied sexual activity. For example, remember how the camera pans to the wind chimes as Celie and Shug began to kiss in The Color Purple? Or, you could do something petty like break the 4th wall to explain to the audience that, “Even though you don’t see it on screen, this character is now placing a condom on his erect penis. Also, afterward, he will remove said condom and the scene will continue. But remember! You won’t see any of this!”

I saw Prentice’s tweet stating that the writer’s room assumed safe sex and so should the viewer. But that wasn’t good enough for some of you. Someone tweeted at Prentice that “what if young people are watching?” First if all, that’s not any of his business.

I really hope they either 100% ignore you crybabies or they troll you.

Did you enjoy this retelling of what you already know? Let me know by contacting me at Danielle@frizzyfro.com or find me on Twitter @frizzyfropod and Instagram at FrizzyFroPod.